Saturday, August 21, 2010


I'm saving this post on here instead of myspace. Since myspace is so dumb and totally not cool anymore.

Twiggy. Named for her long slender legs and tree dwelling. Since my house has been in the process of being repainted and I currently have no screens on my window, Twiggy has come to visit me three times. Not totally sure of how Twiggy has made her fine entrance into my kitchen each time, I decided to document the process a la camera phone.

Exhibit A- Twiggy Face

This is Twiggy.


Wait wait wait. The light from my camera phone is making twiggy look rabid. Twiggy is not rabid. At least I hope not. Lets try this again.

This is Twiggy.


Little less rabid, not sure about the creepy department. Well whatever. That is Twiggy. Twiggy appears at her window, 9:30 pm. Same time as last night. Same time as the night before. Twiggy apparently has an amazing body clock. Anyway. I start to hear her scratch the window a bit, slowly pushing it open a crack.

Exhibit B - Twiggy Hand


This is twiggy's little arm and hand. This is also the scene that amazed me the most because not only did twiggy's arm come in but she proceeds to grab the handle on the window and tug. Seeing the twiggy arm I am compelled to feed it like a dumb ass. I think to myself, its just an arm. If she decides to do anything I can simply shut the window really hard and snap it off. So I place a tomato in the twiggy hand. And she grabs it. And throws it on the roof.

Exhibit C -Twiggy Head


Twiggy does not appear to like tomatos. Nor does she like 9 grain wheat bread. Perhaps too many grains? Perhaps not enough? Either way twiggy is coming in.

Exhibit D- Twiggy Body


Twiggy has arrived. Note the thin frame. The long legs. The slender tail. Twiggy is obviously bulimic. She does not want a tomato or wheat bread. She is here to binge on pudding and pizza and hot dogs. She will later purge in the trees.

Twiggy left late last night probably around midnight. I checked once before that to see if she was still in the room. She was. On the floor, laying on her back, feet straight up in there air. Cutest fucking thing ever.

Two days later Twiggy attacked me in my bedroom and ate all my mice. They were named after the Golden Girls and they're all dead now. True story.